Arn't I the romantic?

I found this on facebook, it makes my day. Too cute. Im not one for emotion. But i loooove this.

Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep... wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you're just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky his is to have you.... The one who turns to his friends and says, 'that's her"

That one person.

I need to stop putting others before myself.
It just end with me in tears, wondering why people don't do the same for me.
I don't expect everyone to put me before themselves.
I just want that one person,
That would, not get off the phone, if they could hear how upset i was.
That wouldn't go to sleep, knowing I can't sleep
That would go to any lengths to just see me smile.
Just one person, that would treat me like, I'm worth something.
I look out for other people. but who's looking out for me?
Sometimes i will put my self first, stop repressing my feelings, tell the truth as i know it.
And i end up hurting people, and then I'm back to fixing someone else, and not myself.
I do love helping others though, it's just....Like treat others the way you want to be treated means nothing,
care for others, and they expect you to always be there, but they sometimes are there for you.
I just want someone to put me first, cause, i don't know how to put myself first yet....
SM

My book.

Do you ever get that feeling where you feel so overwhelmed that you feel buried, and want to give up?
That you are buried so deep, there's no coming back?
Homework.
Classes.
Parents fighting.
Parents mad at me.
Sister moves out.
Relationship.
I hate the feeling of just being truly overwhelmed .
I just want to wave my white flag and shout "You win, world. You win"
I don't want to deal with anything anymore. I just want to sit, and read.
No real people. Just fiction. Imagination.
It's a good vacation from my chaotic world.
I just don't like my reality right now.
I like my delusion.
I just want to be not busy.
And read, my book.

SM

Frank Sinatra. You make my day.

Frank Sinatra. You make my day.
Though the last poem, was how I feel when I am down. This song is how I have felt for six months, and 18 days. I love you, and you know who you are.

For once in my life

I have someone who needs me
Someone I've needed so long
For once unafraid
I can go where life leads me
And somehow I know I'll be strong
For once I can touch
What my heart used to dream of
Long before I knew
Someone warm like you
Could make my dream come true
For once in my life
I won't let sorrow hurt me
Not like it's hurt me before
For once I've got someone
I know won't desert me
I'm not alone anymore
For once I can say
This is mine, you can't take it
As long as I've got love
I know I can make it
For once in my life
I've got someone who needs me

A new, but quite sad poem.

I found this poem, and it's  almost exactly how I feel, 80% of the time. Sad, but true.
The appearance of happiness.

The appearance of happiness,
Such a sad thing,
To appear happy,
People start to expect things of you,
Expect your smile,
Expect your laugh,
So you begin to force it,
Your smile gleaming with happiness is just an act,
A charade,
To fool others into your appearence of happiness.
-E.C.

A crazy love of Sinatra.

"Thats life, and as funny as it may seem, some people get there kicks stomping on a dream, But I won't let it get me down, Because this fine ole world, keeps spinning around."

"I thought of quiting baby, but my heart just aint buying it."

"Ive been up and down and over and out, and I Know one thing, each time I find myself lying flat on my face, I pick my self back up and get back in the race."

" Fly me to the moon, Let me play among the stars"

"in other words, hold my hand, in other words, baby kiss me,
Fill my heart with song and let me sing forever more"

"Please be true, in other words, I love you"


I just can't get over it. Just listening to a few words of Sinatra it brightens up my day,
Even his darker songs, of dissipating love, and desperation. The way his voice echos while singing of such depressing topics, just draws me in, and refuses to let me go.

But in his songs of love, Those get to me. I understand what he is saying.

Oh Sinatra, You, Sir, are class.

And another poem.

A new peom that I discoverd by the same author, as my previous one very much sparks my intrist.
I enjoy peoms that don't say much but you get a feeling out of them, You can conect and identify with them.
Like the following one, I belive many people can identify with it.
Everyone has someone come into their life, that they belive is to good for them, and will leave any second they can get.
Its a self confidence issue, not beliving in ones own greatness but the greatness in others.
Its about that little voice in your head that doubts yourself and your own greatness.
I found it quite revelent to youth.

Your leaving?
So soon?
I shouldn't have kept my hopes so high.
I knew it
your gone.
Just leave.
You want to.
You need to,
Your not leaving?
You will soon...
-EC

Changing.

I feel like I have changed the direction of my blog so many times,
Ive deleted posts, added posts, changed the background, changed my veiws, and I sense it going in a new direction once more.
And as I change, my Blog does as well.

I enjoy finding poems that I feel are revelent to my oh so vauge subject of youth, and maturing.
Struggels of teenhood.
Vauge, but i try to stick to the same subject.

So i shall continue on this new path.

"When you reach the end, go in a completley new direction"

Join me if you will.

SM

Just a poem.

I found a poem recently, that I really enjoy.
It just makes me think. About alot. I can't explain it.
I just felt the need to share it.

It being just about, not really wanting to fall in love, and be that vulnerable with another person.
But it does happen.
Again i just felt the need to share.

You know,
Why do you have to make me smile?
Everytime i see you,
It makes me smile.
Why do you have to do that?
Yes, why do you have to make me smile?
I never really smile.
Well i do,
but not the way i smile at you.
not in that way no.
Not the way i smile at a joke,
not anything else.
I smile at you like i am,
Well in love.
Why do you have to do that?
Be so nice,
funny,
Handsome.
Why?
Want to stop?
Why? Im young. i can't be in love.
Can i?
No, right?
Yes.
Maybe?
Oh God i don't know.
I like to think i am.
I am.
Yes i am
Thank you.
Now im in love with you.
Why did you have to do that?
Make me fall in love.
-EC

I am a wisher.

I wish alot.
Alot.
I wish for love.
I wish for happiness.
I wish for peace.
I wish.
I am. A wisher.
I was told recently, that wishes don't come true.
I am told Wishing is like praying. And all it does is give false hope.

If i couldn't wish or pray, i would have, no hope.
And whats a life full of no hope, no expectations.
No dreams. No goals.
A life of contentment.
A sad life I should say.
So yes, i am a wisher.
And I wouldn't have it any other way.
SM

Enjoy it children

I find my self sometimes having moments of true happiness. When everything is going in the way I do favor. The family is content, no fighting among my circle of friends, having a boyfriend that i truely care about, it seems all to surreal.

As teenagers i feel that this feeling is all to scarce, mostly feelings of stress, and depression come over us, Its becasue your too worried about that guy not liking you, or a bad grade, or the Fam is being not soo peechy keen. It can pile up way to fast.

Its hard to just stop and take a breath becasue as teens our life is just passing us by. But when you stop, look, and breeth you realize you are in the golden years of your life, everything can be acheiveable, nothing is impossible.

I have written prior about life not being in our control, and the majority of the time it isn't, But when you awknowlege the things you do have control over, it reasures you that this life is worth living every second is to be lived to the fullest.

So hears the doctors orders, come teens near and far hear my diagnosis,

For the teenage blues-
Take a dose of breathing in the air around us,just stop and look around its beautiful, trust me
And a second dose of appriactiating everyone in your life, they are there for you and they know you will always be there for them

And a final dose of pure insanity, your a teen, be crazy, it's your job.

Take as directed,

Dr. SM

It's difficult.

As being a teen, a crazy one as that, things happens that we as teens don't necessarily agree with.
We are all under the gorgeous age of 18, meaning are lives are not our own, we are the puppets of master puppeteers, just going along with it, but desperately trying to break free of our strings.
But like i was saying, things happen beyond our control as they do with most people,but as teens we have even less control.And it becomes frustrating, to look at our lives and know there is nothing that we can honestly do...
We are no longer ignorant children not capable of knowing whats really going on, we know whats going on, but again there is nothing we can do. That is what i think is most difficult about being a teenager, we can't do much, but we are so close to being able to have that power. We can see it but we don't have it quite yet.

I'm rambling, but i think being a teenager is a lot about watching, we can comprehend whats all going on but again no control, And as frustrating as it is, it's what we have to do to learn to do better.

I don't know, It's just all difficult.

Fellow teen,
SM

Nobody Reads blogs

Nobody reads blogs,
Oh good golly its true.
And if you are reading this why are you?
On the intronet too much buddy?
Match.com?
Facebook?
Yep I bet.
You should hop on a treadmill.
And put down the cheetos.
So if i haven't personally insulted whom ever in this world is reading this,
I like ya, your alright.
Blogging has become a profession now, Like a title.
"well i work in a graphic design branch of a multimillion dollar company, You"
"what oh, i blog, bout star wars, ironic situations, and Sarah Palin"
What a career path, witch i am so Merrily skipping down.
It is fun to Blog, lets everyone know you got a pair.
Most people have a topic to blog about,like interior design, and cooking recipes.
But at this point im just doing it for shits and giggles,
and ill leave you at that.
Good day,
SM